Don't fit in? Get bullied and pushed around? Is there so much pain in your life that you think about hurting or killing yourself? If so, DON'T DO IT!!! Posts here can give you the strength, courage, wisdom, and hope that is necessary to overcome your difficult times.
I want you to know I have been in a situation like yours, so I care. You are going through a lot right now, but you don't have to go it alone.
Giving up is not an option.